Do you remember what a hit that song was, by Bobby McFerren? “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” was the number 1 hit in 1988! I bet some of you reading this weren’t even born yet! I was the ripe age of 12, being a pre-teen know it all. I was just in Jr. High, it was a great song that all of the kids at our school dances could get up and dance and sing to. It is a happy and fun song, I remember it even impacting me then. Why don’t we just not worry, and just be happy?
I was a hyper sensitive kid, well actually I was hyper and I am sensitive. Some of my friends and neighbors would argue I am also still hyper, but that’s another story. See, I am an only child, I grew up in a home where observing my parents behavior was a part of life. I watched them interact, I watched them discuss their concerns, and I listened to them talk about their day. What I observed was that my Dad occasionally had a lot of stress, or worry. I also noticed that my Mom was very carefree and was able to ease my Dad’s worry and stress. I remember making a decision at my very untroubled age of 12 that I was going to be a “happy go lucky” type of person when I grow up. I even remember being at The Foothills Market and finding stress relief pills in the vitamin aisle and using all of my allowance to buy these pills for my Dad. A small price to pay to rid the stress and worry out of your life, and so simply by just taking a few pills! I remember the reaction of my Dad when I gave him my gift I found at the market was not what I expected, in fact I believe I made him worry more just knowing that his daughter was quite aware of his stress.
Even being aware of this at a young age and making a conscious decision that I was going to be that “happy go lucky” type of person I still find myself occasionally in a state of worry and stress. In fact, for a few months before I left on my adventure I was having a terrible time with stress and worry, occasionally manifesting into paranoia. I often wonder if that is an inherited trait or if I am in charge of my state of mind. I think it is only human to have highs and lows or even flight or fight stresses. What I have become more aware of through my Yoga adventure is; How you react to a given situation is managed from within, a trusting of something greater than myself. It can be as easy as taking a stress tab, you just have to learn how to unleash your trust and belief from within. Yoga teacher training was my tool to help me unleash that and not worry, and be happy.
Here is a favorite go to stress relief tip:
It really is that simple! Read the chart over and over, the arrows ALWAYS point back to don’t worry!
My Dad is a great help, even though it is the family joke that Dad and I stress while my Mom just skips along with her head in the clouds, whenever I have been stressed, needed advice or help I can always ask my Dad. About 6 months ago my Dad shared this story with me, that his Dad shared with him. I would love to pass it on now too. It is really a cute story and metaphor.
The Farmer and the Man with a Broken Down Car
~One late evening a man was driving through a old farming town trying to get to the next town where he was staying. As he drove through the Farmland the space between houses grew larger, and larger and became more, and more rural. Suddenly in the middle of two large corn fields the man’s car stopped running. Oh no! He was out of gas! Immediately he started cursing at himself, “How stupid am I?!? What am I going to do now, stupid!?!” After several moments of anger, his emotions now turned to worry. It was getting very cold outside. He wouldn’t be able to stay the night in his car. He would have to walk to one of the neighboring farm homes nearby and ask for help. Then he started thinking how rude it is to ask for help so late in the evening. How could he possibly inconvenience anyone for something so stupid he did to himself? As he got closer to the farm his anxiety’s and worry’s grew bigger and bigger. How angry would the Farmer be when he knocked on the door asking for help? Oh, the stress was almost imbearable! Finally the man approached the door with great worry and stress, he was just about to knock when really he just wanted to give up and leave. Suddenly, the door swung open. It was the Farmer, with a great big smile on his face. He welcomed the man in the farm house, gave him some coffee and began sharing with the man that he saw him approaching the farm. He continued sharing that it’s rare to have people walking around at this time of evening. His next words out of his mouth were ones the man didn’t think he would hear, the Farmer asked what he could do to help. The farmer had empathy when the man said he had run out of gas. Ultimately, the man got the help he needed and he met a nice person who had empathy. The thing to note was, how much energy did he waste by stressing and worrying?
How many times have you spent time worrying and/or stressing when ultimately things worked out? Things may not always work out exactly how you would want but I always like to look back with gratitude and find something good about the situations that I found myself in. I always try and look on the bright side, be “happy go lucky”, and Don’t Worry, Be Happy! Again, we are only human, and we just do the best we can.